Get over here, Loser! My riding boots are still dirty and you're going to clean them now, so I can put them back into the closet. Obviously, you're going to use your tongue for this task ... you'll start at the heels and then slide your tongue all the way to the tip of the boots, and then again, and again - and you will not stop until the boot soles are completely clean again! Next, you'll clean your tongue and then get to work on the leather - this time, you'll start at the tip of the boot and then slide your tongue up all the way to the top of the boot leg! Needless to say, that you'll also lick up all the dirt that fell on my living room floor when I'm gone ... but before I go, I've another surprise for you. I'll take off my riding boots and press my sweaty stinky riding socks on your nose. How you like that, loser? And what's worse? Eating the dirt off my boots or inhaling the strong smell of my socks?!